You know, at first there doesn’t seem to be too much overlap between the Pirate world and the Doughnut world. Other than the fact that doughnuts would make for utterly useless eye-patches. However, a little digging brings up this story from the Smithsonian about Hanson Gregory, a young ship’s captain who supposedly stabbed the ship’s wheel through his mother’s fried dough cake to free up his hands. (Or he put holes in the middle to skimp on expensive ingredients. But really, which version sounds cooler?)
Maybe it was the nautical nativity of doughnuts that inspired Krispy Kreme to come up with their “Talk Like a Pirate Giveaway”. On Friday, September 19th, Krispy Kremes around the country will be giving 1 free doughnut to every landlubber that comes into one of their stores and talks like a pirate. Or, if you’re feeling more adventurous, they’ll give a free dozen if you come in dressed like a pirate. In order to qualify for that, you need to be wearing at least 3 of the following items – Eye patch, pirate hat, bandana, peg leg, parrot on shoulder, loose white shirt, knickers, leather belt, silver/gold necklace/earring, pirate hook, and pointy black boots/ragged brown sandals. We included their language here, just in case this deal does only apply to “landlubbers”. If you are an actual pirate who wants free doughnuts, you might want to tone down on the outfit. Another note to real pirates – weapons are NOT allowed, even play ones, so leave that stuff at home/onboard your ship.
We didn’t read ALL the rules, so we won’t be held responsible if you don’t get your doughnuts. However, we feel comfortable saying that coming into the store shouting, then looking the cashier dead in the eye and saying “I am de captain now” WILL NOT be rewarded with anything but disapproval. The same can be said for regaling the crew behind the counter with tales of your days torrenting copyrighted materials from the high seas of the internet. You’ve been warned.
For more info on this promotion, including all the rules we skimmed over, head to the official webpage. ARRRG you ready for it?